


the art of flying in winter

by asael



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Christmas, Getting Together, M/M, Mentions of past abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2017-12-23
Packaged: 2019-02-19 03:19:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13114896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asael/pseuds/asael
Summary: Ronan and Adam stay at Hogwarts over the winter holiday and find ways to open up to each other - and to be stupid teenagers.(Harry Potter AU)





	the art of flying in winter

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kasket](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kasket/gifts).



> This was written for Kasket for the TRC exchange in 2017! I hope you like it, I really enjoyed writing a Hogwarts AU and got super into this! Have a lovely Christmas and an awesome new year! 
> 
> Also, I am definitely not British, so apologies for any clearly American word choices.

_Adam,_

_I still wish you’d both come with me. Christmas is going to be dead boring here, especially with Jane at her home and Noah off to Incheon with Henry. Hogwarts is so empty at Christmas holiday, won’t you get bored? I know you said you had to study, but you can’t study the whole time. Ronan certainly isn’t going to._

_Speaking of Ronan, will you keep an eye on him? I know asking you to keep him out of trouble is asking the impossible, but perhaps your good influence could keep him out of trouble that would end in permanent injury or explusion. Perhaps, if we’re all very lucky, you might be able to trick him into cracking open a book. It’s as if he doesn’t even know the NEWTs are coming up - or, more likely, he doesn’t care._

_I’m going to miss you both terribly. Helen has already asked about you once, wondering why you didn’t come to our estate for Christmas again this year. I told her you wanted as few distractions as possible. She didn’t seem convinced that was a good reason. I’m not sure I am, either._

_I am going to try to convince Jane to visit for a day or two during the holiday. I hope this isn’t overstepping - I know you said it’s been nearly a year since you two broke up, and you don’t mind, but it still feels odd. She might not even say yes. She seems quite annoyed with me half the time. However, I wanted you to know, and I am afraid I’m a bit of a coward - it’s easier to say it via an owl than to your face. But I like her very much, Adam._

_Have a lovely holiday, the both of you. I hope Ronan isn’t too terrible. If he is, you know you’re always welcome here._

_Your friend always,  
Richard Campbell Gansey III_

Ronan was _almost_ studying.

It was a sight to see, honestly. He had parchment and quills spread out in front of him, textbooks open to relevant passages, careful notes borrowed from both Adam and Gansey in organized stacks. His wand was ready for any practice necessary, and he had a small supply of ingredients for any Potions testing that needed to be done.

Naturally, he was feeding Chainsaw pieces of popcorn instead, stolen from one of the garlands on the Christmas tree in the Great Hall. He threw them into the air at careful angles, watching as she swooped through the Gryffindor common room and caught them centimeters from the floor. Every now and then, a fierce, pleased grin caught his face and Adam had to look away for a moment.

Adam had suggested they study in the library, and now he supposed he knew why Ronan had scoffed at the idea. They’d have been kicked out immediately. He hadn’t even bothered suggesting his own common room - the last time Ronan had gotten anywhere near the entrance to the Slytherin dungeons, he’d come to blows with Kavinsky. Very few of Adam’s housemates were still at Hogwarts, but he’d still rather avoid the possibility of more violence.

Besides, Adam hadn’t put up much of a fight. He liked the Gryffindor common room. It was always warm and the other Gryffindors were not too unfriendly. The red and gold was a little garish, but he couldn’t really talk. Slytherin green and silver wasn’t much better.

He watched as Ronan tossed another piece of popcorn into the air, then reached out and neatly caught it before Chainsaw could. The raven squawked, offended, and Ronan turned to scowl at him. “What the hell, Parrish?”

In apology (to Chainsaw), Adam held out the popcorn and let her pluck it from his fingers. He raised an eyebrow at Ronan. “If you’re not studying, what’s the point of this?”

Ronan sighed, long and loud, as if the mere mention of studying was dragging his very soul from his body. “To do literally anything but study. And here I thought you were supposed to be smart.”

Adam didn’t allow himself to smile, even if he wanted to. He wasn’t too fond of trying to keep Ronan on task - Ronan was Ronan, and would do as he pleased, and while that once had annoyed Adam he now liked it - but Gansey had asked him too, and anyway Adam really did need to study.

“The NEWTs are coming up. You might not care, but I do, and if you fail every one you take you’re not going to be able to get any job.” Adam tapped his quill against the pile of notes in front of him - Arithmancy, a subject he was beginning to feel somewhat confident about. “Then you’ll have to live on the streets and make Chainsaw scavenge for you.”

Of course, that would never happen. Ronan was the heir to a fortune - or part of it, anyway. All the riches Niall Lynch had assembled before his death would go to his sons, and Ronan would never want for anything in the world. 

But there was no reason to let him get complacent about it.

“Seriously, you’re going to study the whole time? There must be something else to do here.” Ronan kicked the leg of the table they were seated at. “What did you do before?”

This was the first time Ronan had stayed at Hogwarts over the Christmas holiday. It was not the first time Adam had.

Interhouse friendship was more common these days, but still nowhere near as common as sticking to your own house, especially in one’s early years at Hogwarts. But Adam had been unable to make friends among the other Slytherins - no matter that the Sorting Hat had placed him there, he was still a Muggleborn. A Mudblood, to some of them, and not worthy of friendship. On top of that, he was poor, and he retained his caution and unease around strangers - well, around people in general - even now.

So he’d had no friends until he fell in with Gansey around fourth year. Gansey, the youngest son of a famous wizarding family, who was charismatic and friendly and - Adam discovered - incredibly nerdy. He’d been pulled into Gansey’s orbit, and suddenly he’d had friends. Gansey, Noah, Ronan, and in the years since they’d picked up Blue and Henry too. More than Adam had ever had before, and true friends, real friends, people who cared about him.

He spent every summer at home - there was no choice in that. But the Christmas holidays had been spent with friends - at Gansey’s richly appointed manor, at Blue’s warm and crowded home, at the beautiful and wild country estate of the Lynches.

But before that, for four years, he’d stayed at Hogwarts. Alone.

It sounded like an awful, lonely fate. Gansey had thought so when he heard it, and Adam had never wanted to argue with him. He’d never wanted to admit that even Hogwarts alone had been a thousand times better than a cold, frightening Christmas with his mother and father.

“I studied then, too,” Adam said. “I had a lot to catch up on.” The Muggleborn students always did, and Adam had been burning with the desire to know more, be better, earn his place here. Fight for a better future than he’d believed possible.

“Fuckin’ nerd,” Ronan said, and he shifted in his chair. “There has to be _something_ to do.”

He looked over at Ronan and saw the crease in his brow, the set of his lips. Ronan wasn’t made for this, the way Gansey was, delighted to learn new things - or the way Adam was, working to prove himself. This wasn’t where Ronan needed to be, it wasn’t what his heart beat for.

They all knew that. Gansey struggled to accept it, but Adam never had. Once he’d gotten over his resentment that Ronan didn’t appreciate the opportunities he’d been born to - rich, pureblood, talented - he’d understood. This was just Ronan.

Ronan Lynch, who made his heart beat faster.

He reached over to the pile of notes in front of Ronan and pulled out a couple sheets. “Here. Just look over these - actually do it, don’t doodle in the margins and ignore what’s there. When you’re done we’ll go down to the kitchens.”

Ronan looked over at him, speculative, his eyes resting on Adam for a moment too long. Adam smiled, a quick flicker of his lips, and Ronan looked away.

“I know a couple of the house elves pretty well. We’ll get butterbeer and pasties and we can go try to find that secret passage Gansey keeps talking about.”

Though he didn’t look back at Adam, Ronan grinned. “All right, Parrish, letting your hair down. You’re on.” He pulled the stack of notes toward him and retrieved his quill. It was the first time Adam had seen him actually attempt to study all day.

He turned back to his own work, unaccountably pleased.

❄❄❄

_Lynch,_

_I can’t believe you gits all ditched Gansey’s holiday party. I’m going to have to go alone and it’s going to be awful. He asked me to stay a couple days, too, so I refuse to be held responsible for anything that happens: arson, murder, equitable distribution of their wealth to the lower class of this country. This is on you and Adam, you know._

_Make sure Adam takes a break. He’s been studying non-stop since school started. I think he’s afraid he’ll fail all his NEWTs and have to go back home. We all know that isn’t going to happen - he’s way too smart - but you know he’s never really believed that. You’re a shithead, but he lets you distract him sometimes, so do your job right._

_I know you’re not going to respond to this letter. Or at least you better not, since last time you responded with a Howler that sang that hideous song you like, and if you do that again I’m not speaking to you anymore._

_By the way, enjoy the glitter in this envelope. I’m passing it on from the letter Noah sent me. I hope it got all over you._

_Blue_

The snow had stopped, but Hogwarts was still covered in a thick blanket of it, cold and glittering and perfect. There weren’t many other students staying at the castle over the holiday - which meant that when the snow fell, it remained on the ground, untouched. Ronan liked the look of it, the way it smoothed out the world and made everything feel clean and new.

And he liked fucking it up.

“I need some air,” he’d said, and it had been true. Adam had stayed at school to study, and as a result Ronan had been forced to study as well. And it wasn’t too bad, not really, even if Ronan would never admit it aloud. 

Adam was so focused and careful when he studied, methodical and organized and stubborn about it. Sometimes Ronan watched him with his books and his notes and thought that maybe he should have ended up in Ravenclaw with Gansey, but the one time he’d made a mocking comment about it, Adam had rolled his eyes and made an offhand comment about not being smart enough.

Which was stupid, because Adam was the smartest person he knew. But Ravenclaw, Ronan thought, was about the pursuit of knowledge because you loved knowledge. Adam pursued knowledge as an escape, a rung on a ladder, a way to prove himself.

No wonder he’d ended up in a house of ambitious pureblood assholes who didn’t deserve him.

So they’d been studying, at least most of the time, until Ronan couldn’t take it anymore. He’d demanded a walk outside, and Adam had acquiesced - Ronan thought he’d very much needed a break too, had divined it from the crease between his brows and the tension in his shoulders.

It was possible he spent too much time watching Adam Parrish.

They’d gone outside, into the cold and the snow, in their warm winter cloaks and coats, Adam with his Slytherin scarf that had a singed end from a stupid prank some of the other boys in his house had played the year before. The air had had a bracing effect. They’d enjoyed the light on the snow, the beautiful lines of the castle in winter.

Then Ronan had instigated a snowball fight.

It had not entirely been a conscious choice. Adam’s back had been turned for a few moments, and Ronan couldn’t help himself. The snowball hit Adam full in the face as he turned toward Ronan, and he looked shocked, then angry, then calculating. Then he’d reached for his own handful of snow.

It had degenerated from there. Adam, clever and pure evil, had enchanted a few snowballs to chase Ronan and divebomb him. Ronan had counterattacked by tripping Adam into a snowbank, then sat on him and shoved handfuls of snow down his shirt. He thought he’d won, until Adam flicked his wand and a torrent of snow descended on Ronan.

It ended in a draw, when they were both too cold to continue. Adam’s cheeks were pink and his eyes were bright, a smile tugging at the edges of his mouth when his eyes caught Ronan’s.

“Your study breaks are the worst,” he said, and Ronan grinned, sharp and pleased.

He liked this. He liked when Adam let down his guard, let himself have fun, forgot about all his shit for a little while. He liked the easy, open smiles and the laughter.

He thought he’d made the right decision, staying at Hogwarts. Last year -

Last year had been bad. The first Christmas after his father died, and they’d all been wrecks, and they hadn’t thought about how Christmas would be. Before, Niall and Aurora had made the Lynch Christmases perfect. A tree, decorations everywhere, presents chosen with love. Christmas music, his mother’s baking, his father’s cheer. Sibling squabbles, Matthew’s laughter. Ronan would visit Gansey for a day or two, or Gansey would visit him, and as they got older Adam came too, and Blue, and Noah.

It was perfect. It would never be that again.

Last year had been them trying to reach for something like that happiness again. He didn’t know why. They’d all known it would be impossible, with Niall dead and Aurora deep in her miserable sleep. But still, he and Declan and Matthew had all gone home, in their grief and unhappiness unable to accept that it could never be the same.

So, it had been bad. Ronan didn’t remember all of it, because he’d been drunk a good portion of the time, but he and Declan had both come out of it with black eyes and he’d spent the remainder of the holiday at the Gansey estate, angry and hurting and doing stupid things.

Gansey had said once or twice, in his more vulnerable moments, that it was lucky that Ronan had survived those first few awful months after his father’s death. Ronan would never tell him just how close it had come some nights.

He would never be the same boy he had been - none of the Lynches would - but he no longer sought out danger. He was, he supposed, healing. Not that anything could ever really heal the hole Niall had left, but he had to continue on somehow anyway. Once, that had seemed impossible. Now, thinking about the past year - Gansey’s devoted friendship, Adam’s careful attention, Noah’s brightness, Blue’s fire, Henry’s - well, whatever the hell Henry had to offer (great hair?) - it felt like something he could do.

But he and his brothers had all collectively decided, without discussing it, never to repeat that previous Christmas.

Matthew had gone with friends on a trip somewhere warm - the Maldives, Ronan thought, some rich punk’s beach house. Declan was out of school now, and had chosen to work over the holiday. They’d all visited Aurora before going their separate ways, and it had been tense and quiet.

Ronan had considered staying with Gansey again, but he didn’t think he could handle it. The Gansey family was not like the loving, affectionate Lynch family had been, but it still felt beyond his abilities to watch a happy family at Christmas, knowing what he had lost. Gansey had not understood at first, and Ronan hadn’t been able to explain, but he’d accepted it eventually, with no small amount of concern.

Adam choosing to stay as well had made it easier. Ronan didn’t know all of Adam’s reasons, beyond being a huge nerd who wanted to spend the break studying, but he didn’t think he was more than a small part of them. Which was good. He was tired of being treated like a time bomb, like someone they all had to keep an eye on, just in case.

And this - well, he’d sort of thought spending the holiday at Hogwarts would be miserable and lonely. But with Adam here, it was… boring sometimes, because they did so much studying, but other times?

Other times, it felt like the beginning of something new.

“Hey, I had a plan. If you freeze your fingers off, we can’t study anymore,” Ronan said, and watched the quirk of Adam’s lips as he tried not to smile.

“Don’t be stupid. I’ll just make you take notes for me, Lynch,” Adam said, bumping his shoulder against Ronan’s. “With a strict limit of no more than two swear words per line.”

“Taking all the fun out of it,” Ronan said, and followed Adam back inside, to the warmth and the light and the Hogwarts Christmas decorations.

It wasn’t home. But it wasn’t miserable, either.

❄❄❄

_Ronan,_

_Jane is here. She was here when I opened your letter, all delighted and hopeful since you never write. You ought to have seen her face when I discovered what was inside. I don’t think she stopped laughing for five minutes, and I am certain I will be finding glitter on my clothes for weeks. It was worth it for the way she laughed, though._

_She told me where you got it. Noah is to blame, and as a result, I am packing what’s left that I can find and sending it right back to him. If he is going to inflict glitter on us, it’s only fair that he receives the same in return. Unfortunately, he’ll probably like it, so we’ll have to find something else to teach him a lesson._

_I will be sending my presents along by owl shortly. What have you got for Adam? He makes it so difficult to buy him anything, and I don’t want to make him angry, but I refuse to get him nothing. I thought a replacement for one of his more battered textbooks, but we only have a half a year left of school. It doesn’t seem worth it._

_If you have any ideas, please do tell me. I’m at my wit’s end. However, I am pleased to hear that you have not yet burned the castle down or injured yourself. Keep up the good work._

_Reluctantly, your friend,  
Richard Campbell Gansey III_

“You fly like you’re gonna fall off any second, Parrish,” Ronan said. “Come on, live a little!”

Adam shot him a look, his hands tightening on his broomstick. Ronan was pretty sure if he weren’t wearing gloves his white knuckles would be visible from across the Quidditch field. “I am going to fall off any second.”

Ronan scoffed. “We all had flying lessons. You know how to do this.”

Shifting on his broomstick, fifteen feet above the ground, Adam was clearly out of his element. He was so smart, so dedicated, so good at putting pieces together - but when it came to flying, Adam Parrish was lost.

Sometimes it was easy to forget that Adam hadn’t grown up in the wizarding world, that he still spend the summer months with his worthless Muggle family. Ronan fully intended to hex them all one day - or maybe some simple punches to the face would be better - but that was beside the point. Adam was so good at spellwork, at knowing things even Ronan didn’t know, that it often seemed like he’d been born into this.

It wasn’t until moments like these that Ronan was reminded that wasn’t the case.

“I haven’t exactly been able to practice,” Adam said, biting out his words, prickly and standoffish. He never liked reminding them that he wasn’t from their world, even though none of them cared - even though Gansey loved learning about Muggle things, and even Ronan had been charmed enough by their inventions to name his raven after one.

Ronan thought about it. He supposed that was true. Adam couldn’t practice flying in the summer months, with the Muggle shitheads. He wasn’t on the Quidditch team, though he’d attended games back when Ronan had been a member. (And hadn’t that been a sight, the Slytherin with the best marks in his class cheering for the Gryffindor team.) Adam really hadn’t had much chance to practice since initially learning it, not with everything else he spent his time one.

“Should’ve made you come out with me sooner, then. Come on. Follow me.” Ronan flew higher, keeping his pace slow and his movement even so that Adam could keep up. The air was bitingly cold, but they were both wrapped up in enough layers that it wasn’t too bad. Besides, down on the ground, waiting for them when they were done, was a basket with a warming spell on it full of snacks and a canteen of hot chocolate. 

Ronan had learned very quickly over the holiday that Adam was able to coax treats from the house elves with no effort at all. He’d seen it plenty of times already, that bashful charm and careful smile. It had the same effect on him as it did on the elves.

The wind whistled past his ears, and he resisted the urge to go faster. It was frustrating, keeping his pace to something that Adam was comfortable with it, and he swore at Adam in colorful, endless chains that seemed only to amuse him. The patience and frustration was worth it, though, when they were finally flying in steady loops around the field, varying their height, Ronan chasing Adam in circles who turned and chased him in return.

When they finally settled to the ground again, Ronan on his top-of-the-line Firebolt and Adam on his school-issue broomstick, they were both flushed and happy. Even with gloves on, Ronan could barely feel his fingers, and he was pretty sure his nose was about to fall off.

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this good.

“You still fly like a granny,” he said, uncapping the canteen and pouring it into mugs. He only spilled a little, which was pretty good, all things considered.

“You fly like you’re trying to win a race, even when you’re alone,” Adam said, unbothered by the insult. He’d been doing much better by the end, and they both knew it. He tugged his wand out of his sleeve and whispered a charm, touching the tip to his hands and then reaching out to take Ronan’s in his.

Ronan stiffened, but only for a moment. Adam’s hands were warm, emanating heat that easily took the chill off Ronan’s fingers. It was practical, Ronan told himself, Adam was simply being practical. He ignored the warmth in his chest, awakened at the touch of Adam’s calloused fingers.

They sipped their chocolate in silence for awhile, Ronan digging some biscuits out of the basket as well. He broke one in half for Chainsaw. Adam reached out, and she let him stroke her feathers. She liked him.

“Sometimes I still can’t believe this is real,” Adam said, his voice quiet. He was looking out at the Quidditch field, but Ronan knew that wasn’t what he was talking about. “I used to dream that someone would appear and take me away. Tell me that place wasn’t where I really belonged. But by the time it happened, I didn’t even dream about it anymore.”

Ronan didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what to say. Adam so rarely talked about his home life, about growing up a Muggle, about his family. They knew, of course - some of it, anyway. Adam came back to school thin and pale and bruised, and once with a broken arm. He had only secondhand robes, old books, donated school supplies. He never went home until he had to. He never talked about his parents.

Ronan hated them.

“I thought they had to be wrong. That it was a joke. I was really sure of that, right up until I came here.” He fell silent, drinking his chocolate.

“You belong here,” Ronan said, because he had to say something, and because it was true.

“Not everyone thinks so,” Adam said with a twist of a smile. 

“Yeah, well, some people are shitheads,” Ronan said. Adam’s housemates might not appreciate him, but by now Ronan knew part of it was jealousy. They might look down on him for his blood and his poverty, but he had the best marks in their year, a certain brilliance with his spellwork, and the respect of most of their professors.

If they didn’t see what Ronan saw, what Gansey and Blue, Noah and Henry, half the professors saw, that was their problem.

“We’ll be finished at the end of the year,” Adam said. “I don’t know what I’ll do after that.”

Ronan rolled his eyes, conveying his opinion on that with a deep and uninterested sigh. “Please. You’ll have your pick of departments in the Ministry, they’ll be begging you to take a position with them. Or you could go overseas like Gansey's gonna, follow his crazy research. Or you could work here - bet they’d offer you a teaching position if you so much as hinted you wanted one. You’re a fucking genius, Parrish. The wizarding world’s your oyster.”

The tips of Adam’s ears were pink. He didn’t look at Ronan. “You have a lot of faith in me.”

“It’s not faith,” Ronan said. “Just the truth.”

He didn’t lie. Everyone knew that. But, in that moment, he wondered if he’d said too much.

“Come on,” he said. “Get up. We’re not done yet.”

“You were freezing two minutes ago,” Adam said, but he obligingly packed away their food and stood up. “I’m not sure I’m up for more flying.”

“ _You_ don’t have to fly,” Ronan said. He got on his broomstick, then pointed to Adam, scowling. “Get on.”

Adam stared at him, at the broomstick, then at him again. “You’ve got to be kidding.”

“Get on, or I’ll make a scene,” Ronan said, his threat rather hollow considering they were completely alone on the field. Still, Adam got on.

As Adam’s arms went around him, Ronan briefly considered whether he’d made another stupid decision. Adam was distracting enough sitting across from him - Adam sitting behind him and holding on, breath soft in his ear, was ten times worse.

Then he rose into the air, and it didn’t matter so much.

Ronan had always loved flying. He had always been good at it. He’d been on the Gryffindor Quidditch team for years until quitting the year before, and they’d won more often than not. He cut through the air like his raven, turning on a dime, diving in freefall and catching them just before the point of disaster. He let himself get lost in it, the air slipping past, the wood beneath his hands, Adam’s arms around his waist.

He shouted, joyful, and pulled them into a loop. Adam’s gasps and tension turned slowly into laughter, and then he was whooping right along Ronan, their voices thin against the vast sky, but free and loud and real, and Ronan knew he would never forget those moments.

❄❄❄

_Adam,_

_I thought visiting Gansey without you guys would be awful, but it hasn’t been too bad. It’s mostly just been the two of us going on hikes and exploring, and him talking about all the research he’s doing. Basically like being at Hogwarts, but without class._

_It’s fun. He absolutely ridiculous sometimes, but… I like him. I guess I have for awhile. I guess you probably knew that. That’s why you told me to go, right? I bet you’ve been rolling your eyes at the both of us for awhile. Well, there’s nothing to roll your eyes at anymore. He asked me out yesterday. I said yes. It was all kind of awkward, but really sweet too. And that’s all I’m going to say about that._

_It’s been weird without you, though. You and Lynch, but don’t tell him I said that. I miss Noah and Henry, too, but they’re always going off on their own to make out anyway. I promise on my life that Gansey and I will not do that. Disgusting. Anyway, I miss your dumb face, and Lynch’s ugly mug too. It seems like you’re both having a good time together, though._

_You know how I said you were probably rolling your eyes at us? Well, I’m rolling my eyes pretty hard at you, too._

_See you soon, Adam. I’m sending your gift along with this letter._

_Happy Christmas,  
Blue_

Adam wasn’t very good at giving gifts. Before becoming friends with Gansey, he hadn’t had any experience with it, and even after he hadn’t really had the money for it. He still didn’t. The first year they’d been friends had featured a lot of fights about money and gifts and holidays. It wasn’t so bad now - or at least he tried to be more easygoing about it - but he knew he could still get prickly sometimes.

It was easier, actually, when the gifts weren’t given face to face. When he didn’t have to think about schooling his expression to the proper one, gratitude and happiness. It wasn’t that he wasn’t grateful, that he wasn’t happy - it was just hard sometimes. It wasn’t pity, he knew, but receiving something from his much more well-off friends felt like that sometimes.

So it was a kind of relief to open his Christmas gifts with only Ronan there, in the warm comfort of the Gryffindor common room again. They were the only ones there at the moment, another stroke of luck.

When Adam had spent the holidays at Hogwarts alone, he’d ignored Christmas. He never had presents to open, and preferred to keep himself busy with studying or wand practice or really anything that could distract him. But now he had presents, he had friends, he had Ronan here with him. It changed things completely.

They’d opened most of the gifts already. Korean treats sent by Noah, along with strange half-mechanical half-magical gadgets from Henry that were supposedly meant to sharpen quills. Books from Blue, who’d sent Ronan a Muggle t-shirt that simply said FUCK in big block letters. Ronan had been delighted. 

Gansey had gotten him a new bookbag, which Adam did not necessarily need but which he could admit would be nice. His old one was patched and fraying and not quite roomy enough anymore, and this one was high quality, with shiny brass buckles and clean leather. It was better, really, that Adam didn’t need it - that it could simply be a thoughtful gift from a friend, rather than a piece of charity.

He’d gotten Ronan a new set of Quidditch gear, which was probably a message of some kind - they all knew Gansey had been trying to encourage Ronan to rejoin the team, thinking it would be a safe outlet for his desire for high-speed mid-air near collisions. Adam was inclined to agree, especially after he’d gone flying with Ronan (and that, that had been incredible).

Adam’s own gifts always took a long-term sort of planning. Given his lack of money, he wasn’t able to make impulse purchases if he found something perfect, and he also wasn’t able to save his shopping until the holidays. So he was careful, keeping an eye out for appropriate gifts all year long, purchasing them when he could and hiding them away until a birthday or Christmas. He didn’t tell anyone this, of course, and he didn’t think they really thought about it. That’s how he wanted it. The important thing was that he was able to give them gifts, even without boatloads of money and free time.

An old book about Welsh kings for Gansey, a Muggle sewing kit for Blue. A charmed snowglobe for Noah and a tiny model airplane for Henry, who would enjoy taking it apart.

Ronan was more difficult. Especially now. He’d had an idea, back in summer when he’d been at home, and he’d pursued it thinking of Ronan’s birthday - but then it had seemed like too much.

Things were different between them. Had been slowly becoming different for the past year or so, as Ronan recovered from his father’s death and Adam began to realize he’d nearly caught hold of the future he’d been working towards for so long. They’d spent more time together, looked at each other longer. Touches started to mean more.

Adam didn’t think it was only him who felt that way, but he was afraid. So he’d chickened out at the last minute and given Ronan a collection of sweets from Honeyduke’s instead. 

He wasn’t going to chicken out this time. Not after - this. After the days they’d spent together, studying and exploring and flying. He was afraid still, because he couldn’t be sure, couldn’t be absolutely certain of Ronan’s feelings, but he’d also decided that he couldn’t let that fear rule him. He couldn’t let fear rule him at all.

At the end of the school year, this time, he didn’t have to go home. He wouldn’t have to go home ever again.

He looked at Ronan, relaxed on the floor in front of the fireplace, fiddling with the strange gadget Henry had sent. The firelight softened the sharp lines of his face. Adam found it hard to look at anything else, at least until Ronan looked up and caught his eyes.

He tried not to get embarrassed about being caught staring, but his face felt flushed, and he knew his ears would be pink. Fuck.

“All right. Your turn,” Ronan said, and to Adam’s surprise, he looked a little embarrassed himself. Or uncertain, maybe. He fetched a messily-wrapped package from behind the nearby chair and tossed it into Adam’s lap, where it landed with a soft thump. “Happy Christmas, or whatever.”

His attempt to seem cool and uncaring was oddly charming, and Adam suppressed a smile. Ronan had given him gifts before, of course, but this year was different - felt different. 

It was a scarf, soft and warm and probably expensive, in a gentle blue that Adam quite liked. He ran his fingers over it and felt the scarf begin to give off heat, the perfect amount to take the chill off when they were outside.

It was a simple gift, but thoughtful in a way that Adam had not quite expected. His Slytherin scarf had been in a bad state for years, but he’d never been able to convince himself to spend money on a new one. He hadn’t thought anyone had noticed. And the color - well, he’d made an offhand remark about being excited to get away from green-and-silver once they’d finally left school. But he’d said that once, and only once.

Ronan, apparently, had heard and remembered.

“Thank you,” Adam said, simply and honestly. “I really like it.”

Ronan shrugged. It was hard to see with the firelight on his face, but Adam thought he might be blushing, just a little. “Yeah, well. Can’t have you freezing your damn face off.”

Though it was plenty warm inside, Adam draped the scarf around his neck anyway, enjoying the soft slide of the fabric against his fingers. “It’s a nice color. Subtle but not boring.”

“I thought about neon plaid,” Ronan said with a grin. “But that blue matches your eyes better.”

Adam could not have put words to the way hearing that made him feel. His eyes widened in surprise, and for a moment Ronan looked caught out, like he’d said something he hadn’t mean to say. And maybe he had, but this was Ronan, so he covered it up with bravado as quickly as he could.

“I’m expecting something real nice in return, Parrish. A new broomstick, maybe. Or a dragon egg.”

“A dragon egg,” Adam said. “Don’t you think Chainsaw would be jealous?”

“Jealous? She’d boss any dragon around.”

“Come on,” Adam said, and stood up. “I’ve got your dragon egg right over here.”

He lead Ronan out of the Gryffindor common room and through the halls of Hogwarts, to one of the classrooms. It was a deliberate choice, and as Adam lead Ronan into the Muggle Studies classroom, he began to feel nervous.

“This better not be a trick to make me study,” Ronan said, looking around with disinterest. While Gansey adored Muggle Studies, and Adam had not needed to take it, Ronan was only interested in a few specific Muggle items: loud music, destructive devices, and cars.

Adam could only provide one of those.

“Don’t worry. I’m already shocked at how much studying you’ve done this holiday, I’m not going to push it.” He walked to the record player in the corner of the classroom, and to the bag he’d left next to it. “These are your presents.”

Leaning down, Adam retrieved a record and placed it on the turntable. As it began to play, he tried not to watch Ronan. 

It had taken him a lot of time and a fair amount of his collected spare change to find these records, after Ronan had listened to a few Muggle songs and decided they were excellent. But electronics didn’t work around magic, only mechanical turntables, so Adam had devoted his time to tracking down obscure LPs of terrible EDM music. Luckily, the hipster market meant that even electronic music was on vinyl now - but it still hadn’t been easy.

And he wasn’t sure Ronan would like it, at least not until he saw the expression on his face.

For a moment, Ronan was surprised. Then the surprise smoothed into something close to pure delight, an expression Adam had so rarely seen on Ronan’s face in the past year, and Adam felt like his heart could stutter to a stop any second.

“Fuck, Parrish. This is amazing.” He went to the turntable, picked up the record sleeve, then knelt down to go through the others. “There’s like seven records in here. Jesus Christ, how’d you find all this?”

“Eight, and they’re all absolutely awful. Pretty much insults to the entire idea of music.” Adam smiled, relieved and happy and feeling like everything was worth it. “I figured you might like them.”

“You really are a goddamn genius, Parrish,” Ronan said, and smiled at him.

“I couldn’t get a record player,” Adam said, a little apologetic, “but I figure you’re rich enough to get one for yourself. If you don’t have one already.”

The music thumped around them. It really was awful, but Adam found himself enjoying it anyway, the way its discordant sound assaulted his eardrums, the way it never seemed easy. Off-putting and strange, but still appealing, and if that wasn’t Ronan Lynch in a nutshell he didn’t know what was.

His hand went to the scarf around his neck. He took two steps and knelt next to Ronan.

“Hey,” he said, and Ronan turned toward him. Adam shut down all the thoughts whirring in his head, all his doubts and fears, all his uncertainty - just for a moment, just for one instant.

He leaned in and kissed Ronan.

Ronan’s lips were slack against his for long enough that Adam began to fear that he’d misread things, misunderstood everything. Then Ronan’s fingers threaded into his hair and he was kissing Adam back, fierce, hungry, all hesitation gone.

They kissed until they were breathless, until Adam’s knees began to ache where he was kneeling on them. They kissed until all he could think about was Ronan - although, if he were honest, that was practically all he’d been thinking about for the past hour or so anyway.

When they separated, Ronan was flushed, a smile curling the edge of his thin lips.

“Damn,” he said, and traced the line of Adam’s cheekbone with one thumb.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for awhile,” Adam said, a quiet confession.

“You can do it again,” Ronan said. “Anytime you want.”

He wasn’t afraid anymore. It felt ridiculous that he ever had been in the first place. Adam leaned in to kiss Ronan again, and that terrible music filled the room around them, and he was quietly, perfectly happy.


End file.
